Gone Squirrel

I can't believe she's gone! She just wasn't there one day. Or the next day, or the next. I was about to celebrate her here on the blog as the Queen of the Oranges. This is the latest picture of her, where her tail was already changing from its silvery beauty into a more orangey color. But the last time I saw her (which I didn't have a chance to capture as I didn't have my camera), it was a truly bright orange -- proof positive that she was the progenitor of the resurgence of orange-tailed squirrels we've been blessed with this year.

Mother

Yes, this is the mother of all orange squirrels, I'm pretty sure of it. And now she's gone!
What could have happened to her? Well I've been extremely depressed by the thought that I may have killed her. The last time I saw her I threw a peanut at her and it hit her on the head. Right after that she disappeared up a tree. How hard could I have hit her? Well hard enough for me to be concerned enough to go looking for her the next day. And I did not find her.

Ever since I've known this squirrel, she's been sitting out there like a little lawn decoration, awaiting my arrival (I liked to think). So not seeing her there was a bad sign.

A friend told me that there was little chance that I had hurt her, as a peanut is very light. It's not like being hit with a rock! And I'm imagining that squirrels through the ages have probably been hit by nuts falling from trees. So my friend is probably right. But is it just a coincidence that she disappeared right after that? 

Normally I remain detached from the ups and downs of squirrels. I'm just there to feed them, mainly during the hard days of winter when there's no other food to be found. But I have to admit that this one was different. I had become attached to her and actually became very depressed when she didn't show up, especially when I might have had something to do with it. :(

I'm still hoping that one of these days I'll go out to the park and she'll be there, waiting for me.