Monday, December 6, 2010

Letter to Lina

Dear Lina Macri,
As you know, you have deeply offended members of the New York squirrel community. If you wish to get back in their good graces, salvage your reputation, and once again  feel free to walk your dogs in city parks, I'd advise you to make reparations.

How could you do that? I'd like to suggest that you do some community service that would show your remorse, amd also that you are the animal lover  you profess to be.  Perhaps you could feed squirrels 2-3 times a week throughout the winter months. That way  you'd  have a chance to get to know up close and personal, these wonderful, sentient creatures that are every bit as smart as your beloved dogs. 

You will gain an appreciation for the fact that squirrels, unlike so many other animals, do not hunt and kill other animals. You will learn to love the littlest ones -- the babies -- and hurt for them on the coldest winter days. When you see that the squirrels you feed have to stay outside in the cold while your dogs get to go back to a toasty warm apartment, after their romp in the park, I think you'll develop a new empathy for squirrels. When you see that there are few nuts on the trees in winter and realize that the squirrels, unlike your well cared-for dogs, will have to go to bed hungry as well as cold, I think you will begin to care for them. And that could change your life around.

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